Essential French in 9 Easy Phrases

Ladies and Gentlemen, I have decided that there are several phrases that anyone coming to France should master, in order to be able to communicate with ease.

1. C'est bon.
   This means pretty much anything: all good, I'm ok, finished, it's tasty.
   For instance: How is your meal? C'est bon. / When you're wondering if your credit card payment has been accepted: C'est bon? / You've been talking and run out of stuff to say, or have forgotten what you were going to say: Cest bon. / Should I try this food? Oui, c'est bon. / Would you like another cup of tea? C'est bon (I don't need any more).
2. N'importe quoi.
   Whatever. So, someone says something stupid, and you say "N'importe quoi." However, it's kinda cooler than the English equivalent, because you can say "Ca, c'est n'importe quoi!" (Literally: That is whatever.) This one seems to be kind of a no way/I can't believe they did that/empathise with a friend kinda phrase.
   "So then he told me that he didn't want to go out with me anymore, and that he'd already found a new girlfriend!" "Ca, c'est n'importe quoi!"
   Also, you can talk about people who think they can do "n'importe quoi" (whatever they want). For example, students playing up in a class: "Ils font n'importe quoi!"
3. Putain.
   This literally means whore but, seriously, if you're in the South West, just throw it in at the end of a sentence, or if you're surprised, if you want to say damn...
   "Putain! Tu m'as fait peur!" = Damn, you gave me a fright. Does not mean that you're calling the person who gave you a fright a whore.
   "Mais, putain, je te l'ai dit mille fois!" = Dammit, I've told you a hundred times!
   "Ecoute-moi, putain!" = Listen to me, dammit!
   "Ce putain de stylo ne marche pas" = My bloody pen won't work.
   See? All-purpose word. Putain, c'est fantastique!
4. Con.
   Kinda like putain in that it's for cursing, but it more or less means useless/stupid. I know I talked about this in an email, but I didn't save it. Putain! ;p
   "Qu'il est con, ce mec" = God, that guy's an idiot.
   Prendre qqn pour un con = Take someone for an idiot
   "Tu joues à la con ou quoi?" = Are you trying to be an idiot? / Are you playing the fool or something?
   "C'est con (ce ...)." = (This ... is stupid)/ That's stupid.
5. Prévoir = to plan
   I'm told that the fact I've learned this since coming to France is a little bit ironic, as they rarely plan... but anyway. Useful phrase.
   "T'as prévu quelque chose pour ...?" = Do you have anything planned for ...?
   "C'était pas prévu." = It wasn't planned.
6. "C'était pour savoir..." = I just wanted to know...
   Sometimes, listening to other people's conversations provides you with just the phrase you've been looking for. This one is very simply explained. Just put it at the front of any inquiry, lol.
   C'était pour savoir... if it's here that I can extend the length of my visa.
   C'était pour savoir... if I could get a key for this classroom.
   C'était pour savoir... where the rugby practice is going to be.
   Etc, etc.
7. "C'est énorme!" (Literally, that's huge).
   I find myself using this often: not really sure why.
   Can be used literally, eg standing in front of the Notre Dame: "C'est énorme!"
   However, from what I understand, it's also used like "that's a big ask": So, learn your dialogue by heart for next week. "C'est énorme!"
   And I have a 5-hour meeting: "C'est énorme!"
   Or, "It's a 24-hour flight to get back to NZ": "C'est énorme!"
8. Par contre = however, possibly a bit like 'actually'
   This can be used formally, to show opposition.
   Historically, the Maori party has been more closely allied with the Labour party. Par contre, lately they have moved to have closer relations with the National party.
   However (par contre), I hear it used all the time in spoken language, often just when people want to change the subject slightly.
   Are you going to have lunch with us? No, I'm eating at the canteen today. Par contre, I'll be in the library at 1.
   I told him to come at 3. Par contre, Sally can't come.
9. Hop là = (more or less) ooh! Possibly "whoa!"
   I don't even know if I've written this correctly, 'cos it's very 'spoken.'
   Someone smashes a glass: Hop là / Someone almost bumps into you in the street: Hop là / Someone appears out of nowhere: Hop là

The Life of Speed Racer

When I was talking to its owner yesterday, I found out that this bike has quite a history. As she was young in the time when you went everywhere by bike, it has really travelled.



It has been down the the Gave in Pau, to go swimming. Just to clarify, the bike did not go swimming. But the owner did.



One day, she and friends went to Lourdes (I think this was from Pau because, if it was from Saint Gaudens, WOW).


It has also been ridden around the Paris ringroad. Now that is brave. However, she assures me that there wasn't as much traffic around in those days.


If you enlarge this, hopefully you'll see Pau in the South West, near the Spanish border.

For the moment, however, it is contenting itself mostly with short hops around Saint Gaudens, with a few excursions to nearby towns. Kids these days... soft.

Outdoor Lunch: Tick; Feed People Marmite: Tick

Sometimes, I have moments here when I think "yeah, that's exactly what I imagined France to be like."

Eg: when I first found the market in Saint Gaudens. It takes over the whole town on Thursdays!



Most recent example, was a lunch in the back yard at the Atelier des Cultures. Have been doing a language exchange with the French lady who runs it; that is to say that we meet each week and spend an hour speaking French, and an hour speaking English.
She invited me to come along to a workshop at the Atelier and, at midday, we had a shared lunch in the back yard. We had amazing luck, because it was a beautiful day, and quite warm. A week later, it was about 1.6 degrees outside, so clearly we picked the right one. ;p





There were many countries represented here: France, Spain, Argentina, Britain, America, Holland, Germany, New Zealand. Everyone brought something typical of their country and, as you may have seen in the photo, I introduced these poor, unsuspecting people to Marmite.

The British lady insisted that British Marmite was better. One French guy was like "that stuff's disgusting" and told me about how someone had told him it was like Nutella, and given him a spoonfull. If that's not cruel and unusual punishment, I don't know what is!

I forget that people don't have any concept of what Marmite is like, so it was the Brtish lady and French guy who were giving the "no, that's too much" instructions.

It seemed that, in general, people thought it was pretty yuck. Oh well. All the more for me.

Galette et Couronne des Rois

I'm just going to completely steal what I wrote in an email about this...

"Discovered a tradition here: la galette des rois, and la couronne des rois. For Epiphany (but it seems to have extended to include before Xmas, and pretty much all of Jan) people eat these yummy cake things, the names of which I listed above. In one of the pieces, there's a fève... I think that's how you spell it. Generally a little porcelain thing, kinda like the hiding a penny or whatever it was in the Xmas pud. And whoever gets this fève puts the crown on and is King for a day. Although, I think someone told me that they can also choose a Queen (or a King, I guess, if a lady gets it). Anywho, (I'm really hoping I've got this the right way around), the galette is kinda like a sweet pie: pastry, with an almondy filling, sometimes frangipani-flavoured... I think there are quite a lot of variations. The couronnne is more of a bread-like thing, shaped like a large doughnut (or crown, logically) with sugary crystals on top. In other words: yum. We should take up this tradition. Oh, and you also drink cider with it. So I'm not complaining."

Picture below was taken at the lycée, as their social club organised to have this spread for the staff. Couronne = the one closest to the camera. Galette = the one at the end of the table.

Fridge Magnet Fun (Thanks, Mum)

Woohoo for Kiwi words! Mum sent me over here with the magnet set, so I finally decided to have a go on our fridge.


Kingi was very pleased to see his native language again.

The New World That My Bike Allows Me To Discover...

Speed Racer... a close up.

Speed Racer from a bit further away.

The thriving metropolis of Sarvathès. But it is really cute.

Pyrénées from just beside Saint-Gaudens.

Me trying to be really French (very near where last photo was taken), with my baguette, mountains in the background and Kiwi... ok, so wasn't trying to be totally French.

Near Sarvathès, looking towards the Pyrénées. Yep, pretty sweet.

Down below Saint-Gaudens.


Felt like I could have been at home here... SHEEP!

Party Like It's 1999: NYE

Sabrina and I were invited to an apéro at Abou's to celebrate NYE. This was good not only for the social side, but because it made me use French. This time, Sabrina and I had ended up speaking English, and therefore my French was deteriorating! However, some people still seemed to think I could barely understand French and tried to speak English to me. Lol.

Anywho, our hosts had been busy preparing food, so we ate very well that night! Chips, nuts, foie gras, chicken, rice, some kind of tasty sauce... sure I've left lots of things out, but you get the idea. And there were, of course, liquid refreshments available.



There were several mentions of playing a game like poker or something of the like... however this never happened. Probably luckily for me, as I don't think I'm made for poker! What did happen was what I can best describe as a circle of dance. One person started and did a few seconds of dancing, then it was the next person's turn, and so on, and so on. This proved to be surprisingly entertaining. Also, I have decided that guys from Mayotte know what they're doing when it comes to dancing! NZ guys could learn some things...!

One of the guys started to teach us some kind of... well, it was kinda like a line dance (I think), but cooler than the typical image I have in my mind of line dancing! However, the size of the living room kinda put constraints on this, and made it kinda difficult for more than 2-3 people to do it at once. However, I still think it would have been epic to watch a group of people (who knew what they were doing) do this. I spent most of my time looking over my shoulder at our 'instructor' because I'd forgotten what step came next!

The threats of teaching us to 'zouk' were realised. As mentioned in another post, Sab had described this dance as "pretty much looking like you're having sex on the dancefloor" (which is why I declared that I was afraid every time they mentioned teaching it to us) and I soon realised she had a point. Anyway, if you want to see what it is like, here's a link. That one really is rather saucy, lol.

However, the boys seemed to think it was hilarious that we found it kinda awkward, and told us several times "n'aie pas peur de moi! C'est que du zouk, il y a pas de mal à ça!" (don't be afraid of me! It's just zouk, it's nothing bad).



Finally, well after midnight, we headed to a nightclub. First one was a total rip-off... we paid for parking only to wait in the cold in a queue and then be told we couldn't get in. Sabrina (and many others in our party) still reckons that the doormen were just being racist... well, their loss. Second club was (thankfully) more successful. Even busted out some zouk when there were appropriate songs and ahem, well, anyway, let's just say that even if I didn't take up the cheeky waiter on his French kiss offer, it was no biggie since another opportunity arose...

A Proud Moment For NZ

Before I forget, I must add this... I was in a bookshop in Montpellier and saw a book called something like "La Battalion maorie." Of course, I had to investigate... surely enough, it was Patricia Grace's "Tu" (which I had finally read not long before leaving NZ) in French. What's more, one of the two translators was one of my former lecturers. Proud!

http://www.victoria.ac.nz/slc/staff/jean-anderson.aspx

Pubs

Well, we had to entertain ourselves somehow...

Sabrina had the brilliant idea of doing a pub quiz, so we went to a couple of different English pub-style places to ask when the quiz nights were.

The first pub ended up as a bit of an epic fail. Firstly, we didn't know which language to speak when asking, so went with French. When they replied (in French) we were like, ok, they were English speakers. Anyway, they told us the night (maybe Thurs; I now can't remember) and the time. So, Sabrina and I went to a movie, and then had about an hour to spare. Went for a big wander around... Sabrina invited her friend, Aziz, to join us... About half an hour in advance, we go to the pub. There's pretty much no-one there. So, we ask the bartender (in English, this time) if the quiz night's still on. He tells us that no, exceptionally, there is no quiz tonight. And we realise that he's a French speaker. Fail. We never pick the right language!

So, we are now in town with nothing to do, and Aziz is on his way. Sabrina suggests checking out another pub: the Rebuffy. This was a great success as, not only did they have very nice mulled wine for me (!), they had lots of board/card games that you could play. Therefore, instead of pub-quizzing, our evening was spent Uno-ing and Abalone-ing. I, personally, had never heard of the latter, but it certainly is a good way to make an hour or so disappear!



As you can see from the level of concentration here, it was serious business. Also, Aziz is awesome 'cos he also let me use Skype at his place - on 2 occasions! :)

Another evening, another pub quiz, and Sabrina and I were really hoping it wouldn't be called off this time! However, it was the Vert anglais and not the first pub we'd tried, so we had a good feeling... That started to fade when the hour the quiz was due to start came and went. However, eventually, we began.



Sabrina and I discovered that we weren't too gifted at the whole pub quiz thing. There was a particularly infuriating round where the guy played a song and we had to name the artist. So many where we were like "I should know this..." And the final round, when we were given pictures of cars and asked to name the make and model. Ugh. Needed my brother/Dad; we would've won.

However, despite what was probably an epic loss, we ending up sharing the third-place-winner's wine with him! Randomly enough, he'd spent some time living in Austrlia. What are the odds?!

Odysseum: As Epic As It Sounds

This was pretty much a day of games. Sweet!

First port of call (perfect phrase to put us in the aquatic domain...) was the aquarium. I didn't want it to be better than Napier's, lol, but I had to admit that it was in the end. It was pretty massive, had quite a few interactive elements and great displays. Including some huge tanks full of pretty awesome creatures (as I guess you'd expect) that it was easy to spend hours watching.



Afterwards, we moved on to bowling. Except that there was an hour-long wait for a bowling lane, so we played pool first. I now forget how much it cost, but this is another thing that probably should have gone on the 'biggest have' list. Seriously, give me a NZ-style coin-operated pool table any day. $2 a game: that's the ticket. None of this 5E nonsense.



That's just to prove that French people struggle with my name. So, we had 2 games of bowling. I realised that I had special skills for bowling in a way that meant the ball turned at the last moment, therefore missing most of the pins. After our games, we decided to move on.

We had to wait for the ice-skating rink to open, so had a look through the shops (including H&M, if Lou and Lorenz are reading this). And also sampled some churros... ah, fat and sugar go so well together. This was also when I decided to check out this IKEA dealio. Which I kinda regretted about halfway through, when I'd had enough and wanted to get out. I swear it took me about 20 minutes of following the signs saying 'exit' (or sortie, rather) to get out. That place is enormous!
Some of Sabrina's friends had shown up by this stage (Ben and Abou).



We all ended up having dinner... at KFC. Big bucket of chicken wings, some chips and unlimited drinks. Some things don't change, no matter what country you're in. Here, we also found out that KFC does not accept 10E coins.



Ice-skating was awesome. I love ice-skating. That said, since this was my second time doing it, I struggled just to stay upright at the start. I managed not to fall, but there were some pretty close calls. So, I spent about half an hour sticking to the edge of the rink and holding onto the rail. I also had to move from the nightclub-style part of the rink to the ice hockey field part, as strobe lighting was not helping my balance.
However, after the initial phase, I gained enough confidence to actually skate without holding onto, or even being next to, the rail. It was strangely satisfying! If you didn't look at the pro people who were all skating backwards, etc.



Went back to Sabrina's friends' place for a while. I tried to play poker. I didn't really understand... not sure if I just don't get it, or if it was due to an explanation in French. Probably the former! The nice young man in the above photo (Abou) let me Skype from his place. :) Very happy times, as I usually don't have access.

Dreaming of a French Christmas

Decided to start our Xmas celebrations with Christmas Eve dinner at... a Chinese resto. It was tasty! To continue the culture mix, I decided to have profiteroles. Yum...

Next morning, had a sleep in (as per usual! Lol), then set off to the zoo, munching on waffles for breakfast! It was a fairly chilly day, so was quite pleased to head into the rainforest part of the zoo. A little bit more like NZ Xmas weather.

Saw lots of different animals, including kangaroos.

I promise there were real ones as well, but here's Kingi trying to make peace (I smuggled him in).

Christmas lunch was looking like it was going to be a non-event for a bit. Nowhere seemed to be open, since we were out of the town centre. Wandered past a few places - all closed - and, just as we were giving up, found a dairy that was open.

So, a well-appreciated lunch of sandwiches, chips and waffles!

Next on the list was a Walk around a nearby park. Nice to spend Xmas arvo close to nature. There was also a fitness trail in the park.

Sabrina was hard at work doing the exercises. She also did sit-ups for about 5 minutes! Although, I can tell you that she regretted this the next day, lol. Anyway, this nice family came along while she was in the middle of this, and one guy's comment was: Ca fait digérer la foie gras! (More or less "that'll work off the foie gras!")

When we did return to the hotel, we ended up accidentally gate-crashing the hotel owners' Xmas dinner to eat our couscous in the corner of the dining room! Once again, we hadn't trusted any restaurants to be open, so had gone to another trusty dairy. :)

Xmas markets (Read: Good Food)

Omg, Xmas markets. Possibly the best thing since sliced bread. In fact, they're WAY BETTER than sliced bread! Especially if you're a bit 'gourmand' (ie you like food). Which I do. As most of you know.

As mentioned, the Xmas market in Paris was visited on a couple of occasions, generally in a great rush! And tasty things were eaten there: tartiflette, crêpes, aligot and farçou, savoyarde, mulled wine... I've probably missed something there, but you get the idea. YUM!

Anyhow, it was in Montpellier that I (and Sabrina) really made the most of the local Xmas market. We were there pretty much every day for lunch, sometimes dinner too, and it was awesome. Every day, it was so hard to decide what to get, but we managed.

Here are some pix of the yum stuff:

Aveyron speciality shop.

Cured meat and cheese plate... (from Aveyron stall).

Kingi with an extra thick hot choc. Think it might actually have been because it was near the end of the batch, but I seriously had to get a spoon to get the last of it out of the cup. Yum.

Choc-covered marshmallow kebab

Some kind of Lebanese pastry. I can't remember what it was called, or really even what was in it, but I remember that it was super-sweet and super-tasty!

Also from Aveyron stall (but another day - I swear): aligot and farçou. The white-ish stuff is a cheesy dealio, and the patties are pork.

I forget who and where everything came from. I think this guy was Lebanese too, but I'm not totally sure. I was pretty happy to see some decent veggies, though. :)

It's accompanied by mint tea, a biscuit that reminded me a bit of shortbread, and a pistachio pastry. Oh, yes.

PHOTO (I'll find this one later...)

This is cheating a bit, as it is not something I ate, nor is it at the Christmas market. BUT it's kinda interesting... in Provence, there are traditionally 13 desserts for Xmas. Mainly dried fruits and stuff. Anywho, you can prob see for yourselves here.

Also made a rather dangerous discovery at the local pâtisserie: almond croissants. They're croissants (I know: imagine that!) with sliced almonds on top, and an almond kinda paste inside. Wow. Like I said, dangerous discovery.

Montpellier

Montpellier is a nice place. :) It's kinda the image I had in my mind of non-Parisian France, I think. Old buildings, narrow streets, fairly nice weather (still winter, though!).

Also really awesome to see lots of young people, as it's a student town.

Was there with Sabrina, who had lived there for a while when she was studying, so she was up with all the important sights, and played the tour guide for me. I admit that I've actually forgotten which day it was that we did what, so I've kinda randomly grouped stuff...

Impressive big cathedral



Our hotel was quite near the Peyrou Gardens, which offered a pretty decent view over the city.



However, prize for the best (freely-accessible) view definitely goes to the Corum, which was not too far from the Xmas market (another favourite place).



Sabrina wasn't too well one day, so I left her to rest and took off on a walking tour of the old town centre. Even though I had wandered about quite a lot with Sabrina, it was still good to hear the extra stuff that the tourguide said, and there were a few places that I hadn't seen. Including a medieval Jewish 'purification bath'... I'm really not sure what to call this, but it said mikve on the sign, so there you go.

Highlight of the tour: going up the top of the Arc de Triomphe (you can only do this on a tour, ie not open to public)



Sabrina and I haunted the movies in Montpellier. We saw 5 while we were there. So, if anyone would like to know my opinion on: Les Emotifs Anonymes, The Tourist, De Vrais Mensonges, Mon Beau-Pere et Nous (The latest Meet the Fockers movie, whatever it's called in Eng) or Un Balcon sur la Mer; let me know!

Also made a trip to Palavas-les-Flots, a beachy town. Really enjoyed going there, as I think it was the place that most reminded me of Napier. Just because there was sea and a little um, darn, what's it called? harbour? Where the boats were moored...
Then again, it wasn't really much like Napier, but it was a very cute seaside place.



I went on a transcanal thingee (can't explain, so here's a photo...)



Saw it and just couldn't resist. Must have been 'be a big kid' day.

Enjoyed tapas in a resto with a cheeky waiter. I commented to Sabrina at the start that he was quite nice-looking and I almost wonder now if he overheard, 'cos he soon worked out I was English-speaking and started being chatty in English. Then he offered me a 'French kiss' as we left the restaurant!

One day we also did a big walk by the Lez river. It was really pretty! Sabrina likes walking, so she knows all the good spots.



One day, we also caught a free concert in the main square. It was in solidarity for the French hostages in Afghanistan, since that day marked a year since they were taken hostage. There was a real variety of music, some old and some new, and the band right at the end was really awesome. Kinda funk style, I guess, with a couple of guitarists, bass, vocalist, keyboard player, sax/flutist, percussion and kit.

Our hotel was also near the Jardin des Plantes. I've always found this name funny, as it - if translated extremely literally - means garden of plants. As opposed to? However, Sab tells me that it's the equivalent of botanic gardens.
So, had a walk around these gardens, too, which I really liked. Green spaces are always good, and this one had a few sculptures, tunnels, raised pathways, bridges... and this "message tree." If I had more imagination, I'd make a book out of this!